Man: One who is NOT, or incapable of, any, of the following—

(Not necessarily in order but the big tickets are certainly weighted)

1. A woman, meant only in the biological sense.
2. A coward.
3. Dependent on others for basic maintenance and services.
4. Working a grill.
5. Afraid of the dark, the uncertain, and/or spiders.
6. Unable to open a beer bottle using basic household items that do not include a bottle opener.
7. Parallel Parking.
8. Any two of the following: throwing a spiral, catching a pop-fly, ice skating backwards, opposite-handed lay up.  
9. Carrying the responsibilities of a son, a brother, a father, and a friend.
10. Taking a punch.

In a Sentence: “How about you take off your skirt, be a real man, and change your own air filter there chief?”