Oh Adam.  You’re so charming.  
Those girls would probably get down with you if you were honest with them and told them you were only doing this to get back at your friends for dicking you over and it doesn’t have to mean anything and after 3 minutes of fun in the copy room they can catch a cab to wherever the fuck they’re from and you get to put another notch on your bedpost.
Or, just keep playing the sad card, that seems to be working.

Oh Adam.  You’re so charming.  

Those girls would probably get down with you if you were honest with them and told them you were only doing this to get back at your friends for dicking you over and it doesn’t have to mean anything and after 3 minutes of fun in the copy room they can catch a cab to wherever the fuck they’re from and you get to put another notch on your bedpost.

Or, just keep playing the sad card, that seems to be working.